SPLASH!
As we gradually emerge from the isolation of Covid, we find ourselves experiencing a changed world on many fronts. While it would be easy to look back and rehash all that we went through over the last two + years, I would rather look toward what is now in front of us and the opportunities we have as humans to reset and relaunch and create meaningful connection and impact on the world. While I often write to business leaders, I would like this to be a personal challenge to anyone who is reading—business leader or otherwise. Below you will see four challenges that will not only have an incredible impact on you personally but will splash the people around you with goodness and freedom. I am asking you to try at least one of these, and if you’re really brave, I’ll ask you to give them all a shot.
1. Thank Someone
In this challenge, I want you to go beyond the casual “Thank You” that comes when someone fills your beer at the bar or rings you out at the gas station. These casual “Thank Yous” are important and mean a lot to those who are serving you, however, I want this to be an impact based “Thank You.” Think of someone in your life who has had an incredible impact on you as a person. Someone who you may not have survived the pandemic without. Don’t text them…call them on the phone or meet them in person and be specific about what you are thanking them for. So often we go through life grateful for the people who have taken the time to help us navigate difficult times and situations, but we forget to tell them. Yes…it's a bit more than a thank you I want you to do here. It will require you to be vulnerable, honest and courageous; but if we do this well, the person on the other side will bask in the light of purpose and encouragement to continue to support, love and care for others. Your “Thank You” is fuel to their kindness and care for others. It also gives them strength and encouragement to know their life matters. You have such power in your words…use them!
2. Serve Someone
When we go beyond words and put our efforts towards the action of caring for others, it assigns worth to the other person. You don’t have to look very far to see opportunities to serve others. Recently, I was incredibly moved by the actions of the Polish and German people who supplied baby strollers at the train stations in Poland for those Mom’s fleeing the Ukraine. They wanted to make sure those Mom’s had the dignity of having the ability to care for their children. What I found most fascinating about this is that we will never see the people who left their strollers for these Moms and their babies. They are faceless. They weren’t doing it for the notoriety of the fame. They were doing it because someone had a need and they had the resources to provide a solution.
The viral image was taken at the Przemysl train station in Poland. Francesco Malavolta/AP Photo
We don’t need lofty causes, or dire needs. We simply need to identify a person with a need and meet that need if we have the ability. I love paying for people’s meals behind me in the drive through (and then driving off before they pull up and receive their order). Every once in a while, I’ll get a glimpse of the smile on their face as I’m pulling away. The truth about serving others is that it does way more for us and our hearts than it will ever do for the person we’re serving. Have fun with this challenge but be careful…you might find yourself, as GK Chesterson put it, “under a freer sky in a world full of splendid strangers.”
3. Invest in Someone
“Invest” is an interesting word! Most of the definitions revolve around money, but I want to offer up the definition that pushes us into the human space.
Invest; to use, give, or devote (time, talent, etc.), as for a purpose or to achieve something:
Think about what this means when we say Invest in a person. That means we use, give or devote our time, our talent, our resources to help them achieve their purpose. While this can come in many forms, I think one of the most impactful ways to invest in someone is to mentor or coach them. Do you have time to help someone lead better, apply a new trade, or help them get better at something that will set their lives on a powerful trajectory of self confidence and success in this world? What would the world look like if we all took on this challenge? There are steps to this process. First, we have to identify the person (that isn’t usually too hard). You can usually throw a rock and find someone who is striving toward their goals or at the very least is struggling to move forward. This could be a friend who wants to start a business and you know how to do that. Maybe you’ve raised your kids already and can lend an ear to a new or young Mom trying to figure out how to make everything work. The investment is just letting her know it's gonna be OK. Maybe it’s teaching someone how to manage their finances, how to exercise properly, or develop good eating habits. It’s true that not everyone is open to this investment. Be humble and kind in your approach and listen more than you talk. Most of the investment you are making is in those two areas. They won’t trust that you have anything to offer until you can demonstrate that you see them and hear them.
4. Forgive Someone
This might be the toughest of the challenges. I read a book by Anne LaMott years ago and I remember a quote that said, “unforgiveness is like eating rat poison and waiting for the rat to die.” The fact is, unforgiveness actually hurts us more than the person we are having trouble forgiving. It’s this really heavy burden that we carry around while the other person might be oblivious to the fact that we’re carrying all of this around. The fact is, we are NOT made to handle such a heavy load. One of the greatest things you can do to set yourself free, when that person comes to mind and you get that hot feeling in your chest, is to say, “I forgive you” out loud. It doesn’t even matter if they’re present to hear it. Forgiveness is actually wishing a person well in your heart. It doesn’t mean you have to go back into friendship with them or reignite the way things were. It doesn’t mean you have to love them in person. You can keep your distance and set boundaries to keep yourself healthy. Forgiveness is a matter of the heart. When you can truly set that person free in your heart, you will be set free as well. This has major implications for how you treat those you love and close to you. When you carry unforgiveness, it affects all other relationships. When you release that unforgiveness, you are free to care for and love the people in your life fully without barriers. I know, easier said than done, but you can do this. If you struggle, find a friend who can help and hold you accountable to the practice. You will find such freedom in this and it will change your life in countless ways!